Funny Status Updates and pictures for facebook!

• wish I could commute by roller-coaster. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
• If you took a Facebook IQ Test and it determined you’re a genius, the fact that you participated in a Facebook test negates the result.
• Updating my status in the car. Don’t worry, I’m in the passenger seat. Which makes it harder to drive, but fools the cops.
• I ordered a self help tape called “How to handle disappointment” when the package came, the box was empty.
• Never do card tricks for your poker buddies.
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
• Maybe that thick glass at the bank is to protect us from the tellers. Some of them look mean.
• You can’t hurry love, but you can honk the horn a few times and let it know you’re waiting.

Some fairy tales begin with “Once upon a time…” Others begin with “If elected, I promise…”

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